Cabin Fever

 

 I'm sure you are all aware of the term "cabin fever". On the off chance that you are not, think of a lonely prospector in the far north, or a trapper up in the mountains, getting ready for winter. He gets his provisions stored, cuts and stacks the winter's firewood, and as the first snow flies he closes all the windows, fires up his stove and settles back for six or seven months of frozen solitude. 

   At first things are fine. He reads books, cooks, stokes the fire, goes back to his book and then goes to bed. In the morning, possibly he has to break some ice in order to carry some water from the nearby stream for washing and coffee and maybe he (or she!) has to split a few logs for the stove . But after breakfast, basically it's back to his book until dinner and bedtime. And this is the routine day after day, for months. And months. And months! No one to talk to, no one to share a laugh with, no one to argue with except maybe his cat or dog if he's lucky enough to have one. 

   Then one day he has a very interesting conversation with himself, out loud! He broods for days over this, and what he should have said to himself. A few days later he has an argument. With himself! And then another. A week later he throws his dinner against the wall and tells himself that he will no longer put up with the crap that his self is cooking for him. He almost comes to blows with himself, and he threatens to sleep in the other room if things don't improve. After another few days he makes good on his threat and starts sleeping in the second bedroom, in the one room cabin. In the spring his partners discover his frozen body on the porch of his cabin!     Cabin Fever!

   The world is getting cabin fever! I am getting cabin fever! And it hasn't been a few months, it's been a year!! And just when it looked like the cold weather was breaking and spring was around the corner we are told, "get back inside, another blizzard is coming!" I haven't spoken a coherent conversation to anyone except Sharon for months. At least not live. There are zoom calls, but I am now having trouble distinguishing them from the television. Are you people real or am I in The Truman Show? And after sitting inside for a year doing nothing I now have nothing to say. Nothing new has happened to me. Sharon gets out hiking with a few friends regularly but because I am the living embodiment of the 2000 Year Old Man, and have no spleen, I have to be wary of people walking by our apartment building, three floors below! Sharon had to drag me off the balcony the other day when I started shouting at someone a block away who was not wearing a mask. If you saw me early in the morning out walking the dog you would mistake me for The Elephant Man as I scurry through the shadows staying as far away from all those diseased wretches as possible. Sharon keeps looking at me as if she expects me to suddenly shout "HERE'S JOHNNY!"

   So what's my point you ask? Why am I on this strange tirade? The following is an excerpt from my latest inner monologue and is meant for my ears only. You can safely skip it and go on to the conclusion.

   "But I'm so bored, when is this going to end? HEY! Remember when Niles slapped Frasier's face for suggesting they go to a restaurant where they didn't even NEED a reservation. Wake up! No one is asking you to charge over a hill in the face of rifles and artillery. No one is asking you to suit up with three layers of PPE and spend 14 hours on your feet trying to save the life of someone who had to go to work or face starvation. All they are doing is asking you to stay at home and watch another bad movie on your big screen TV. But its been a year and I'm afraid it will never end. HEY! Remember when Cher slapped Nicholas Cage's face and shouted Snap Out of It? Well, SNAP OUT OF IT! This is going to end and you will go out and bask in the freedom and never again take your privilege for granted, I hope. Remember, I know you. You will remember and will exaggerate your sacrifice to anyone who will listen until their eyes roll back in their heads. So buckle up, pull up your socks and get back inside and watch the latest episode of The Rich Housewives of Salt Lake City. You can do it, I know you can."

   What, are you still here? I thought I could hear you snoring. I guess the point of this is, don't give up when the gold, and the goal, is so close. Once again the hospital intensive care is overflowing and the system is stretched to the limit and beyond. Much as we want it to be, this is not over. Take a deep breath and carry on carrying on. If we are not on the front lines of this fight we have only one job. Don't make it harder for those that are. I can do this, WE can do this. The fighting will stop one day. The snow will melt. And when it does and we stumble, bleary eyed, out of our fox holes, and cabins, we want to be able to say  "I love the sound of laughter in the morning".

   And my apologies to all the script writers I twisted and plagiarized!

The Loss of the Familiar

   

  One of the things about living abroad that continually rears its head at unexpected times is how much we rely on the familiar in our daily lives. How often we simply do things without thinking. How habits are ingrained in us to the extent that no brain power at all is required to accomplish most of our daily tasks. Living abroad brings that to light almost every day and it can be cumulatively disconcerting to some people. And, at its worst, it can be the thing that sends people back to the comfort of what they know.

   I was reminded of this in the simplest way the other day when I was trying to do a minor repair around the apartment. This little chore required a small wrench to tighten a nut. I realized that at home in Canada I had a variety of tools acquired over the years that made any simple chore around the house just a case of going to my tool chest, picking out the right tool, and finishing the task. No thought or planning was involved and I could crank up the tunes and happily work away while thinking about something else entirely. The result was a feeling of security and control over things that lent a sense of comfort to life. Whatever happens I've coped before and I will again. I'm prepared.

 However, as an expat in a new and somewhat bewildering place, that is not the case. When some simple task arises that took no thought at home I am now faced with a myriad of tasks and decisions that require research, forethought and planning. To tighten a nut I can no longer go to my tool box. I no longer have a tool box. I do have a screw driver, but no wrenches. They were gifted to friends on our departure and are now saving other peoples lives. As a result I feel abandoned and alone. Adrift. Untethered. Insecure. At the mercy of fates I don't understand. Can I still take care of hearth and home like I did before? Presented with enough of these in one day and it can feel like its time to pull the covers over your head and have a good mental breakdown. And I'm not even going to begin to throw in Covid 19!

So now I have to think. That fact is novel when it comes to a little job like this. Is the nut Imperial or Metric? Should I buy just one wrench or should buy a set in anticipation of other larger and more serious problems in the future? But do I want to carry around a set of wrenches in case we move in the future? Where is the nearest Ferriteria (hardware store)? Is my Spanish sufficient to communicate exactly what I need? What time is it, since the Ferriteria may be closed for siesta? How much do I want to spend for something I may never use again? Is there someone I know here that I could borrow a wrench from? Are they expats or local, and if they are local can my Spanish survive trying to explain what I need?

By now I am paralyzed by the magnitude of the problem and the on going consequences of this huge decision. It might be time for a nap. There is nothing in this world which is not improved by a nap, and then procrastination. 

But the point of this little diatribe is that when you become an expat in a foreign country your life becomes a never ending series of life altering decisions like the above. Imagine all the decisions you have made over the past fifty years and then imagine that you are now going to be asked to make them all again. It can lead to a profound sense of insecurity. A feeling of being adrift and unanchored, at the mercy of fates that you thought you had already successfully conquered. Time to put your tail between your legs and head home where everything is as it should be and everything is in its place.

But there is another option, and there is a trick involved. At least there is for me. Luckily for you I am prepared to give you this secret Absolutely Free! No purchase is necessary. Simply read on and my remarkable ground breaking discovery can be yours to use forever. You can thank me by passing it on to other overwhelmed new expats.

So here it is. No problem needs to be completely solved before taking step one. The one thing you have in abundance now is, time. Start by taking step one before worrying about step two. You need a wrench. Who sells wrenches? Go there. With your nut. As you wend your way remember all the happy hours you have spent in the past, searching for just the right electric multi headed power nut driver and orbital sander with optional juice blender. And relive that glorious feeling of success you felt when you found it. That feeling can be yours again. Almost every day! Before you know it you will be home with the solution and your wife will have her hero protector back. Adjust your cape and look around for other mountains to climb. After all, this is what humans do right? Solve problems. Rather than being overwhelmed you will discover a new focus and meaning to life which  had eluded you as you sat complacently in your Lazy Boy, growing moss on your north side. You can do this! And you will rediscover what made life fun when you were young(er)! Along the way you will also discover that you have new things to talk about and a new confidence in your ability to cope with whatever comes your way. As an added bonus you will become the go to guy for people looking to borrow tools which they will never return. Finally you will be the life of expat parties with your new knowledge of obscure Spanish names for common tools and a font of wisdom about where to find anything. 

   But one note of caution. you will have to let go of the idea that there is only one right way to do anything. You will have to suppress the instinct to shout "No, don't do it like that! This is the correct way!" Remember, you are a guest here, and if the host wants to cook his meat without the aid of your multi directional meat thermometer and cordless Bluetooth receiver, until it resembles a piece of tanned buffalo hide, smile and chew silently. At home, with the doors locked, you can use the correct apparatus and cook it how you like it. And when your new local friends come to your place and you triumphantly present them with a beautifully rare steak they will smile and secretly think you are a pleasant but strangely uncivilized barbarian. But, like you, they will eat, nod politely in appreciation, and promise themselves to only meet you in restaurants in the future.

Safely Amusing Myself

                          Safely Amusing Myself During These Tumultuous Times

Since the beginning of the pandemic, Ecuador has been rated #2 in total deaths by the John Hopkins University. This rating is largely due to the deadly surge in Quito (capital city) and Guayaquil (largest port city) in March and April of 2020. Since April, Ecuador has fared well and it's hospitals are no longer overwhelmed with critical Covid patients. Ken and I continue to feel safe and we eagerly await our vaccinations (an unknown date at this time but Lojano first responders and medical teams have had their first shots.)

                       Hiking has become my saviour; el senderismo es mi salvador.

My social interactions are kept outdoors enjoying the fresh air and exploring the local areas of Loja and Vilcabamba.  Once or twice a week, I meet up with a Lojano for a conversational language trade. We walk and talk (caminar y hablar), or sometimes sing because I'm helping a singer with his pronunciation of English pop songs by non other than, Michael Buble. We walk in a local picturesque park along the Zamora River (Bioparque Orillas del Zamora) that has horses, llamas, cows, and donkeys.  

Here are my Sunday hiking pals. We call ourselves The Chicken Drama Jungle Club since we've had a few interesting encounters with local chickens and Marion's three dogs. We now have that drama under control.  (Yes, I was reprimanded by Ken for the lack of social distancing in this photo)

Left to right: me, Marion and Camille who are from France and teach for the French Alliance school (Alianza Frances) in Loja, and Bladimir, a Lojano who teaches English for a local school. All education is currently online. The government had planned to have schools operating in person (clases presenciales) this past January but decided against this for the foreseeable future.

We usually hail a cab from city centre (one that takes dogs) for 2 - 3$  to get to a local trail head and hike to a waterfall (cascada) or walk along the water canal system in the mountains for a few hours then share a picnic in the slopes of bonita Loja.

                        

                                                                                    

 

                                                                                                                                                  
     On Thursdays, I often join a hiking group   from Vilcabamba, The Vilca Hikers.                                          

This group is mostly expats from around the world. While hiking, I hear Polish, Arabic, German, Spanish and American. So far, I'm the only one who speaks fluent Canadian!

(I've yet to rid myself of the "ehs")

                                

The climate and terrain is quite different in the Vilcabamba area which is 40 km south of Loja. In parts, it feels like a desert compared to Loja. (Above and left) This is the Cerro Mandango hike ('The Sleeping Inca'), rated difficult and often an initiation hike because of the elevation gain of 1700 ft. in less than 2 km. There are amazing views once one reaches the nose and then you can continue trekking carefully up a narrow trail, at times using all fours, to climb higher for the best views of the Valley of Longevity and surrounding mountains.

    At first I was a little hesitant to continue to the highest elevation because there had been a hiker who had fallen to her death the previous month on this particular section of the climb. Obviously I overcame this hesitancy and I can happily report - no injuries nor deaths!

       

                                                                     
        

We see birds of prey (hawks and eagles) and hear song birds in the canopies of the trees (I need more patience to capture them by camera). Once in awhile we'll see an opossum, red squirrels, and kinkajous. The best sighting so far, and captured by camera, was the South American coati in Podocarpus National Park (see Oct post 2020; We Interrupt Our Serial) 

And, lots of colourful insects, moths and butterflies. I have also seen tarantulas, but nothing too scary or dangerous (yet?)

This is a glass-winged butterfly; mariposa transparente.

They are common in Ecuador but often hard to spot let alone capture a photo of one. I got lucky this day.

One never knows who, or what, you will meet along a trail...

                     This fellow escorted us along the trail for a couple of kilometers.

                    This was last Sunday's hike. Following a river up to a cascada, 

                                  a popular trail for the local cattle as well.

    And! Carol Lepine (fellow Canadian) popped up a few times during a recent hike too.

                                                     

This cartoon perfectly expresses my, and probably everyone's, feelings about Covid 19 and the restrictions it has placed on all of us. I can only be thankful that Ken and I are in a place where we can still get outside on a regular basis to enjoy nature. All the rest of the things we came to Ecuador for will return in due course. And when they do this blog will be a much more interesting visit for you.

Cuidate nuestros amigos.

One Year!

 Here we are at one year! Hard to believe! January 19, 2020 was the day we arrived in Loja and took up residence in the Air BnB we had booked. All the hard work and planning we had done over the previous two years had finally paid off. We looked around and realized that for better or worse this was going to be our life for the foreseeable future. But little did we know!! And who could have? Nostradamus maybe, I should have checked.

We did get a month to get ourselves organized before the proverbial hit the fan, so in many ways the fates did protect us from being in the middle of nowhere when everything went south. Our first few weeks here we were able to wander the streets, explore the city a bit, get ourselves an apartment, go to some concerts, and in general settle into what we thought was going to be our new life. And then the Gods said, "Sit down and shut up, we have bigger things to do  right now!" Eleven months later I still feel like a kid who has been bad and is sitting on a little chair in the corner, facing the wall, and waiting for the recess bell to release him. 

Of course it has had its moments and, after the first wave in March when things looked pretty grim, especially in Guayaquil, the experience has been more boring than frightening.  Kind of like standing at the window of the bakery looking at all the treats, but the store is closed. The sad part is that because I am slightly older than Methuselah at this point and therefore a prime candidate to take it between the eyes if I'm not careful, I have to look at everyone I meet as if they are the Walking Dead in disguise. Not a great attitude when trying to make friends in a new place. Picture the guy with a knapsack on his back trying to get an unescorted tour of Fort Knox.  "You do realize that before you can get within six feet of Mr. Taylor you will have to strip naked and have a thorough body cavity scan!".  Needless to say I can count my new Ecuadorian friends on one finger. I have some

acquaintances who will wave to me from afar before they scurry off down the street, but friends, no. And although Sharon has made friends, as she always does, they are beginning to think she has me locked in a tower somewhere, if I exist at all! She did bring a few over at Christmas, one at a time, during my scheduled feedings, to show them what she has to put up with. But basically I am the man in the iron mask.

But we have made it this far, and looking back it has been a good decision. I've put on a jacket twice in the last year. The butter is always as I like it, soft. I am disappointed that the planned festivities scheduled to celebrate our one year anniversary had to be cancelled. If you go back to the beginning of this blog you will see the lengths that the local dignitaries went to to acknowledge our arrival, with bands and military parades and children in native costumes giving thanks at local churches. On the upside, ever since I gave the guys on the garbage truck 20 bucks to buy beer at Christmas, I do get huge smiles and waves whenever they see me. It's the one time I feel sort of part of the community! Now I know what millionaires feel like when they buy new friends every few years! And there is one bonus to all this that is infrequently mentioned. If you DON'T want to see someone, you no longer have to dig deep to find excuses for being a curmudgeon. "Sorry, you're not in my bubble. You understand. Maybe next year." And then you secretly hope that one of you will be dead by then, hopefully them!

So, adjustments are being made and life goes on, thankfully without snow, which was a large part of the original plan. I joke about being isolated but everyone we have met here has been extremely welcoming and friendly. We are constantly presented with new challenges and experiences and that's what life is about, isn't it? That's how you grow and become a better and more interesting and evolved human being. People keep telling me that, for me, it should kick in any day now! I would like to be able to interact with more people so as to improve my Spanish. We are studying a couple of hours a day and Sharon is getting very good but the listening and understanding is still very slow. It's hard enough without trying to understand what's being said through a mask. But now I understand why people are slow to react when being held up by a masked bandit. Whoever thought that a pandemic would make me more sympathetic to criminals! Thankfully everyone here wears a mask at all times with little controversy and as a result, although there has been a bit of an uptick recently, there is nothing like the problems elsewhere. For now!! And being born in the crustaceous period means I will be near the top when the vaccine arrives. Then I will be out clubbing every night!

In our next post I promise I will get back to telling you about our wonderful fulfilling life here in the Land of Eternal Spring. This has just been a bit of a ramble through some dust bunnies in the back of my head. If there is anyone out there who still remembers who we are, we are doing great and, in looking back, would not change anything. Anything we have control over I mean. If I had the power, I would have cursed D.T. with a wart on the end of his nose that slowly grew to cover his entire face, but I digress. Here's hoping you all are warm and dry and have your three square meals a day. Everything else is a bonus!

 Remember, if you have change in your pocket you are better off than 90% of the people on earth!

Ken and Sharon do Cuenca

 

So we went to Cuenca a few weeks ago to get our cedulas. It’s like an identity card and you have to have one after a certain amount of time in Ecuador in order to access the health care system etc. Anyway, we were looking forward to the trip as it was going to be a nice break from the usual. Cuenca is a much bigger city than Loja, approximately 5 hundred thousand, and it’s where most of the expats land since the expat community is about 12,000. It’s also one of only three places in the country where you can get your cedula, Quito, Cuenca and Guayaquil.

We decided to take one of the mini vans that leave every hour from Loja for the four hour ride to Cuenca. $12 each and the dog was free. Taking the dog was cheaper than boarding him and the hotel was pet friendly. We had booked  a nice 5 star hotel, right in the center of the city for $50 a night, with breakfast

 At 7 am the next morning Sharon set off for her first appointment. I already had the final document she needed so I didn’t have to go. She was accompanied by our agent, Santiago who has been guiding us through this whole visa process. Be advised that it is more than worth the money to have an agent as the process is complicated enough without struggling with your rudimentary Spanish. (More on that later). Anyway, that went well and they were back by 11am and we all headed out to actually get the cedulas. The Central Registry office was a zoo, with people lined up out the door, but thankfully, everyone here wears a mask, everywhere! Eventually around 3pm we got to the head of the line, got fingerprinted, photographs taken, and then went to sit and wait for the cards. After about 45min my card showed up at the window but not Sharon’s. Out of an abundance of caution because of Covid and crowded spaces I went outside to wait. Sharon then proceeded to have all sorts of problems, had to go back and have the whole thing done again and it was almost 6pm before it was all satisfactory and we could leave. Oh well, that’s life in South America, learn patience. Could have been much worse.  Then a nice dinner at the hotel and early to bed.

Next morning the cab comes to pick us up at 10:30 for the 11am mini bus back to Loja and we are the only passengers with two drivers! How nice is that!  Off we go and before long it’s raining Gatos y Perros. After 3 hours we get to some stopped traffic and discover that the road has been overrun by a mudslide. After much discussion in our broken Spanish we understand we have two choices. Return to Cuenca, (3 hrs and another night in a hotel) or walk with the spare driver past the mudslide. He has called ahead and there will be a cab waiting for us on the other side to drive us on to Loja. After some more discussion we opt for the latter and set out. The mini bus heads back to Cuenca.

After wading through mud and rushing water up to our knees (remember the Gatos y Perros?) we get to the other side only to discover that not only do we have to hike 4 more kilometers but there are more mudslides before we get to where the cab is. And much of it is uphill. And it continues to rain, and before long it will be dark!  Lesson learned at this point? Keep up with the Spanish classes so you know what’s Really going on! Great advice, but the mini bus is gone, along with our options. I turn my head so no one will see me crying, and we head off.

Man, it was awful. Raining, mud, wet wife, wet dog, soon angry wife and resigned dog. I start slowly handing stuff I’m carrying to Sharon until she begins to look like my bearer. Hey, she’s twenty years younger than me, there has to be some advantages to being old! I’m positive it was more like six km, and after 4 hours of walking and    mudslides where we wade through quicksand like mud, desperately holding on to each other in order not to be swept away, we arrive in the little town of Santiago where the cab is. The main street is a foot deep in mud, water, rocks, and logs with traffic backed up for miles. But there’s our cab, a splendid looking chariot if I ever saw one!  When we get in I really should care that the back of the cab is getting caked in mud and water from us and the dog, but I don’t. Not I my friend. Too exhausted.

 We get home at eight. What should have been a 4 hour ride was 9 hours in total. I just turned on the hot water in the shower and walked in with my clothes on, dragging  the dog in with me. For awhile I thought all the mud would clog the drain, but shortly I am on my face, on the bed, out cold. Went for a short walk this morning but for the next few days the dog and I will be staying close to home. He’s just lying there, occasionally looking at up me as if to say “What the ….. was that??!” Anyway, all the above is by way of saying, this living in an exotic, foreign country is not all sun and roses. Occasionally you have to pay. But that’s true everywhere I suspect. Next time I will go back! Turns out I’m a hotel bar kind of guy. Who knew? Intrepid is gone. Hello to sitting in a comfortable chair with a cool drink at hand,  waiting for young folk to come up to me looking for wisdom. First piece of advice… don’t be a hero, take the bus back to the hotel.                                                                       

No telling how many lives I will save!

Merry Christmas

 Here's a big shout out to all our friends and regular readers. Just want you all to know we are well and ready to welcome the New Year. Some of you have been wondering if we are alright  since we haven't posted for  awhile. We were up in Cuenca to get our two year temporary residency visas and our cedulas a couple of weeks ago and the trip turned into an adventure of somewhat epic proportions. I was going to post about it earlier but the magazine International Living had expressed an interest in publishing the story and they didn't want it showing up on our blog as well. It now appears as though they are somewhat lacking in good taste so I will post the story here, with the gruesome pictures, very soon.

For now, here are the lucky couple celebrating with their hard won Cedulas and ready to meet 2021 head on. 

Hope you are all as well as we are and please, have a great holiday.

                           Yes, we are official temporary residents!   

         Remember, on January 1, hindsight will officially be 2020!

The Fight against Complacency

 Every time I start one of these I am awestruck by the size of my ego. To think that there is anyone who would care, one way or another, about what I think about anything is more than a trifle egotistical. But like a fat man looking at an eclair, it's there, I have to eat it. I had an idea, I have to write it down. And if you were foolish enough to get to this page by mistake, or even through carelessness, it's on your head. So today I post some personal thoughts about complacency, both usual and as it pertains to the pandemic.

The pandemic has been raging for months and at the moment is getting worse by the day. And yet the caution that I felt in the beginning has largely disappeared. I suppose through what they are calling "Covid fatigue". One can only stay on guard for so long before your attention starts to wander. You peek your head over the top of the trench and, ping, they pick you off. I seem to remember having the same problem in school, so why am I surprised; "Ken could do so much better if only he would pay attention in class!" An additional sixty years doesn't seem to have solved the problem. But at least now I know it's a problem and I try to guard against it. When an idea for doing something outside of the confines of my limited personal interactions comes up I have to slap my imaginary face more often now. That little voice that says "it'll be alright," has to be stomped on and shut back in the closet. And I have to keep reminding myself of how stupid I would feel if I was very careful for months and then died because I thought some event or occasion would make a nice blog post or a picture.  Here lies Ken Taylor, he got the picture. Too bad it was out of focus!

And I certainly don't think I am the only one. We all want our old life back. I'm trying, but I don't think I have fully incorporated the fact that that's not happening. Ever. Things will be different. The problem is, as yet, we don't know exactly how different. Is it simply that I will have to get an extra shot in the arm every few months or will I have to live the rest of my life wearing a giant rubber condom whenever I leave the house. Maybe that's the problem. I can't see the shape of the future. I just know I want to have one. So I have to keep telling myself that I shouldn't change what seems to be working. Ignore the sirens on the rocks that keep waving at me and saying that life is much more exciting where they are. They never tell you that it might be much shorter as well.

It is especially hard when you are in a new place and want to get out and experience it. Otherwise why are you here in the first place? Top that off with the fact that I have never been the poster boy for delayed gratification and you have a recipe for disaster. When my mother left the room and I was alone with two cookies, having just been told to save one for later, there was never a look of surprise on her face when she returned to find me licking the table top and not a cookie in sight. Oh she tried, I'll give her that. But I always seemed to know that there were more cookies where those came from. Couple that with the attention span of a flea and I was on to other things and other adventures. Which I proceeded to gobble up with equal abandon.

So what's my point? For the first time in seventy .....  years I am realizing that, this time, if I eat the second cookie there might not be any more. In fact, if I eat that cookie there might not be any more ME. Sobering thought. I want each of you to pause for a moment and take that in. Imagine how colourless and grey your life would be without me in it.  It won't matter to me, I'll be dead so I won't know, or care. But you! All of you will have to go through the rest of your drab and featureless existences without me and the constant inspiration I provide. And just now, realizing that, suddenly I an infused with a new commitment to the care and attention ... of me! I have new motivation. I can do this. For you, all of you. Even those of you who will be completely unaware of the work and sacrifice I am putting in. Just so you can continue to have an example before you of what can be achieved if you fritter away every opportunity presented to you and relentlessly pursue each shiny new bauble that appears on the horizon. A life some might deem wasted, but you and I know, is the pinnacle of achievement. That oh so exclusive club of dilatants and vagabonds secretly admired by everyone for their seemingly carefree and useless lives.  Grasshoppers of the world arise!

So I am hereby dedicating it to you, whoever and wherever you are. Come back to this blog in the coming months and realize that you have had a small part in its continued worldwide success. Please, no need to thank me. I am buoyed by picturing the statues that will be erected to me in the future and by the fact that, if I am really careful, I'll bet I can outlive The Orange Idiot. Now there's a goal, (and an opportunity to gloat!) that is worthy of striving for.

I am renewed. Thank you.

Living With Constant Difference

 

   Living With Constant Difference - How to describe the expat life

    I have been trying for sometime to figure out how to describe, in a visual sense, just what the expat lifestyle is like and the hurdles and joys of what a person faces when they decide to live in a strange country. Lo and behold the other day I ran across a fruit I had never seen before which perfectly embodies everything in Ecuador that I find puzzling and wonderful at the same time. 

                            Behold the Granadilla fruta. 

   When I first saw it I thought, "Oh, it's an orange, a little different but I've had different oranges all over the world, this is just another variety." So I picked it up and, surprise surprise, the outer shell is hard. Not like a nut, but hard. And here begins your first lesson in the expat life. Whatever you think you know, you are probably wrong. Things may look almost familiar but starting right from the surface they are not. Time to rearrange your expectations. But don't worry, this is not a bad thing, it's just different. And you will have to adapt. Wherever you are, it's you that will have to make the change. The country may have a hard shell but with just a little effort on your part it will give up it's secrets.

   So what are your first steps? Well, lets try to peel away some layers and discover what lies beneath. It can't be all hard shell. So you make your first tentative tries at peeling away some of the outer protective layer to see what's inside. We all have a outer shell which we use to ward off that which might attack us and it's the same with countries. Sometimes they don't give up their secrets right away. You are the foreigner, so you are the one that has to make the first gentle tries at getting under that hard exterior.

   So we begin, gently peeling away the outer shell. 

   Whatever we do we don't want to bruise what's underneath. After all, that's why it has a hard shell in the first place. But the good thing is, whatever is inside is probably worth the effort. 

   And as soon as we start we immediately come to something we think we recognize. It's the white skin you will see on the inside of an orange. The kind of sinew that holds the pieces of pulp together. So now we are in familiar territory and we can relax a bit. This is not so strange after all. It was just the outer shell that was different. I'll be able to figure this country out in no time and be perfectly comfortable, right? Not so fast!

   By now we have spent a few months in our new country, we have run across a few hard shells, and now we are ready to try to dig a little deeper and really get at the fruit. How different can it be. Just peel away this second skin and get to the juicy fruit part. So we take some Spanish classes, study a bit of history, are pleasant and nice to everyone, and then we break the skin a bit and find... not what we were expecting at all! 

   Underneath all that protection is a tender sack filled with seeds, and all held together with a kind of jelly-like substance that you don't recognize at all. In Ecuador, and in every country on earth, this is the essence of what the country really is. The seeds of what it is, held together by something you've never seen before. And it is completely foreign to everything you know. Some of it, if you are honest, is even a little off putting. Is this something you could get used to? Are you even going to try it? It looks a bit slippery. And how do I eat it? This doesn't even look like it belongs in the fruit category. Kind of like the first time you were encouraged to eat a snail or an oyster.  Guess what, it's a test my friend. Welcome to expat life.

   So get out  your bowl and spoon and start digging. You have to be determined to make a go of this. And surprisingly, everything comes out easily. The seeds are held together by the jelly and it all comes out in one piece. And now comes the ultimate  test. Are you going to trust what others tell you and put it in your mouth?

    At this point you are allowed to make a compromise. You are an expat after all. No one is going to fault you if you don't do exactly as the locals do. If it makes you feel better, add something you are more familiar with, like another fruit, and some granola, and then some milk, and away you go!

   And guess what. it's fabulous! Slightly sweet, smooth, and the seeds are crunchy and delicious. With the granola and a banana you declare that this is going to be your new go-to-breakfast. And, to top it off, apparently it is very good for you. Who would have thought? But that's the mantra of expat life. Try it, you'll probably like it.

   So it's time to sum up what we have learned today about expat life, wherever you are experiencing it in the world. It's never what you think it's going to be. In an earlier blog post I mentioned that at home, time was always  speeding by without you being aware of its passing until one day you said, "Man that year went by quickly." But remember when you were a kid in grade school and summer vacation seemed to go on forever? That was because you were doing something new every day. Things you had never done before. And the reason it speeds by now is because every day you are doing things you have done many times before. You are set on automatic. Expat life is like summer vacation when you were seven. New things, surprising things, exciting things, puzzling things... every day! Some you will embrace, some you will take a pass on. You don't have to love everything. But at no time will you be bored. And guess what, life does seems to slow down! You will never become a native. Don't even try. You don't have enough time. But around every corner is a new adventure. Every day is a chance to learn something new and to challenge yourself. A chance to grow.  

   And, just like when you were seven, it's a never ending summer vacation!                                      

                 Remember Einstein's definition of insanity!

Don't Get Excited

   As always, I am sitting here wondering what to do for a blog post. Initially when we started this it was supposed to be about our new adventures in Ecuador. To most of you that was probably evident from the title. However, the pandemic hit and adversely affected everything, including this blog. Being of a certain age, which unfortunately begins with a seven, the best advice for me was (is) to stay inside, avoid contact with all those filthy diseased persons roaming the streets trying to infect me, wash my hands, and hope I'm still around when the vaccine arrives. Which I have done. However, posting "I walked the dog, I read a book, I watched TV", every week doesn't inspire return visits to our blog.  So I have been racking my brain for something new. And then it came to me!  I'm old, I mean OLD. And since every persons' life is unique, and I seem to have had a bit more varied life than most, maybe I should just occasionally write a post about that. So that's what I'm about to do. At this point you are free to switch to the latest episode of  "The Bold and the Beautiful" if you like, but the gems of wisdom will be few and far between over there.

Don't Get Excited... It Might Not Happen

   I heard the above expression the other day and I was immediately struck by what a load of... bad advice... it was, on every level. For starters, we all get very few opportunities to get really excited about anything in this life. It just plods along with things continuing to proceed in what seems like an ever repeating loop.  Months, sometimes years, go by without us even being aware that time is passing. And passing us by. If you listen carefully you can hear yourself saying "Where the hell did the summer go?"

   And then the prospect of something exciting happening to us appears on the horizon! Suddenly the days are brighter, the sun is shining, the air is cleaner, and all our senses are tuned, humming, and pointed in one direction. We remember what we did yesterday and we are anticipating what we are going to do tomorrow. Schedules are cleared, plans are made, and we tingle with new possibilities. Life is no longer a plod to the unknown but a shining pathway to a brighter future.

And then someone says "Don't get excited... it might not happen". 

   Now I realize that they are just trying to protect us from disappointment. But life is full of disappointment almost every day. We can handle disappointment.  Disappointment is the thing that we are best trained to deal with. In fact, from birth, we are constantly wishing we were smarter, more athletic, better looking, more artistic, more musical, better at math... do I need to go on? We don't need to be protected from disappointment, we are fully armored against it, daily, almost from the moment we open our eyes and realize we are wearing Pampers and not Huggies. 

   But excitement for the future, that only happens rarely. Even if it's only a possible future. So when it happens we should roll in it, wallow, fantasize about it, spread it on fresh bread and eat it. 

   If you grew up in a small town or a close knit neighbourhood you will remember that there were always a couple of old guys you would see around, doing the same things they had been doing for fifty years. Herman would stride off down the street with hopeful expectation, wishing a "good morning!" to everyone he met and meeting the new day with anticipation. Festus on the other hand would glower at you and simply grunt if you greeted him on the street. Every town had their Hermans and Festuses (Festi?) and they were spoken about a lot. When they were gone people often spoke fondly of Herman, the fun things he did and said, and what a good life he had. 

   Festus... not so much.

   So what's the difference? Herman saw the potential of every day. He got excited. It might happen! And sometimes it did, simply because he was ready and open to any and all ideas. Even near the end he could get excited remembering things that had almost happened. His life was broad and full.

   Festus... not so much. 

   So from my perch in what will be your future, get excited! Have faith, and hope that good things will happen. And when you are in that state, things that you never expected will come running around the corner and slam right into you. And your life will change in completely unexpected ways. Then, when you get older than rock, like yours truly, you might find yourself living in the sun in Ecuador, wondering "How the hell did I get here, and could the whole thing have been any more fun?"

   I don't think so.

                             Get Excited!

Why We Moved - Episode six, ....seven, eight, nine, and ten.

   When we left our couple in the buckboard they were headed over the hill with their dog and cat still searching for their elusive dream, a place to put down roots that was safe, warm, and secure. 

   As the camera lens opens this week we find them in green hills with mountains on both sides, both near and far. The sun is shining and it is obvious that it is warm and pleasant. The road is winding and as they round a corner they are met by a darkly tanned man, dressed in unusual colorful attire, walking in the opposite direction. They stop and converse and it is obvious that there is some language difficulty, but eventually they move on and their anticipation mounts. Finally they crest a rise and below them is a small Spanish style town with a river running through it and small houses rising up either side of the valley. A church bell tolls softly in the distance. They have arrived! 

                                               The End

   I was going to try to continue my little ode to Saturday serials for ten episodes along with our ten reasons for moving to Ecuador but I decided that you are probably as tired of it as I am. Getting too cute by half! So I'm going to squeeze as much into this post as I can and move on. Without further ado, here goes.

   One of the things we wanted to accomplish with this move was to simplify our lives. Get off the treadmill and attend to what is really important. We were looking for a different culture and somewhere more laid back and less hectic. Here, most everyone still takes a siesta mid afternoon, something I incorporated into my life a number of years ago.      Now some of you will be frustrated by the fact that almost everything here is sold from small shops and the shop you wanted to visit is closed for siesta when you get there, and won't be open until 4pm. Rather than get upset, you are supposed to either go home, relax and have a nap, or get yourself a coffee and go to the park, sit on a bench and relish how lucky you are to be alive. Then go back to the shop at 4pm and have a long friendly conversation, in your broken Spanish, with the shop owner who by now knows you personally.  He won't have what you want but he will know someone who does or he will go out of his way to get it for you. You might go home empty handed today but you connected with another human being and, since you no longer have a deadline for anything except living well, life is good. Welcome to Loja. And the weather is always good. 

   But here comes the warning! If you can't drop your type A personality and adopt the "go with the flow" lifestyle, then perhaps here is not for you. And there are other advantages. The country is, for the most part ,very safe. Like everywhere there is crime, but here it is mostly petty crime. Maybe we are foolish but we walk the streets here without many worries at all times of the day. There are areas in every city I have ever been that I wouldn't walk in at three in the morning. But I'm in my seventies, I can't remember the last time I was awake at three in the morning!

   And speaking of being in my seventies, health care here is great. There is a national health care system which you can only access once you become a temporary or permanent resident with a government issued Cedula (identity card). But fear not, there are a number of very good private hospital plans that, depending on your age etc., will run anywhere from $100/mo. to $250/mo. And most plans are connected to private hospitals which have excellent facilities and well trained doctors who most often speak English. Once you get your cedula you can access the national health care for approx. $75/mo. if you wish.

If you have pets there are vets everywhere and the cost will be about 10% of what you were paying at home. You can walk everywhere within about twenty minutes and if you decide to live further out there are regular buses everywhere for about 30 cents. Around town a cab ride is $1.50 and every second car in the city is a cab so the wait is usually less than 3 minutes to flag one down. So you will probably be walking everywhere and before you know it you will have lost weight and be in far better shape. I have lost 50 pounds in eight months without even trying. Well, I tried a little.

One last thing that attracted us to Loja, well two things really. This is a university town. There are two big universities here which means a younger vibrant city, and Loja is the cultural capital of Ecuador. Both of these facts mean that there is art, theatre, dance, music and indigenous culture everywhere. When we first arrived we were going to some kind of cultural event two or three times a week, mostly free.  Covid 19 has unfortunately put a stop to most of that but slowly things are, and will be, returning to normal. I guess everyone in the world is looking forward to that.

Lastly what attracted us here was that everywhere else in South America is readily accessible from here. We are looking forward to being able to explore further afield in places like Chile, Argentina Brazil etc.. I may be old but I'm not dead yet.

So there you have it. The remaining five reasons we are here.

1. It's Safe

2. It has good affordable healthcare.

3. It has a simple laid back lifestyle.

4. It has a vibrant arts and culture scene

5. It's a convenient stepping stone to more exploring.

I'm sure I could think of a few more reasons but you're probably packing already. I will leave you with one story. I was talking to our landlord the other day( in my completely fluent and grammatically perfect Espanol) and I mentioned that I had to go to another city, about four hours away, to complete my visa process.  He instantly offered to drive me and two days later we made the 10 hour round trip so I could do the required paperwork. Without him it would have been two days on a bus and a night in a hotel in a strange city. A small sample of why we feel completely at home here. And did I mention that the weather is always good?